Regan White's Ranting and Raving

What's up? Watch out, turkeys!

Well, seems it's been a while since I last posted. Sorry, folks. I just haven't had it in me as of late. 

Quick updates in recent memory:

• I am unbelievably ahead in my Christmas shopping, having pretty much (finally) mastered the art of holding onto presents for an actual holiday and not just giving them out on a whim. Also, in a flurry of organization, most of my presents are already wrapped, sans ribbons, because they were taking up too much room in bags in my bedroom closet. This kind of preparation is starting to really freak me out. Also, because I purchased some of the gifts a while ago, it feels to me like they're "old" gifts. Like the luster has worn off for me even though the recipients have yet to see them and so I feel like I have to keep going out and scoping out what various retail locations have to offer me.

• This brings me to point 2: Sometimes I feel like I'm the only person who's keeping the American economy going. Am I the only middle-income American who is still spending out there? Because I certainly haven't altered my present-buying habits, even in a horrible downturn. Which, in reality, is just a kind way of saying depression. Do I have to carry the economy by myself? I guess so. Thanks a lot, guys.

• Last Monday I had steroids injected into my neck to treat my two torn cervical discs. After a rather amusing allergic reaction to the contrast dye ("why, no, doctor. That's not an allergic reaction. I get the blotch all the time. It's probably the blotch. Oh shit, it's purple and only my neck and head - yeah, that's not the blotch. Give me some Benadryl, STAT!"), I then had a weird as hell reaction to the Benadryl that was fed into my IV. Within seconds my entire body went numb and the room began to spin. I had a metallic taste in my mouth and throat and my pulse went through the roof. It was absolutely horrible. To make matters worse, every day since then I had a horrible migraine that wouldn't go away. My neck was sore and until Monday morning it would occasionally flare up and get swollen and hot. The steroid makes me woozy like a drunken sailor out of nowhere - walking, driving (really safe) - you name it. After a rather lengthy cell phone conversation yesterday with the doctor (I thought I was going to die on Sunday and absolutely nothing was making the migraine better), invariably I was far better today. My neck still hurts but the pain on my right side and behind my eyes and at the base of my skull is largely gone and it's the first time in more than a week that I feel like I can really see out of my eyes. Success! Well, not really for the injection but for my thriving. We'll see how this goes. I'm grateful that today's the first day since last Monday that I haven't wanted to cry starting around 3 p.m. and haven't had to lie flat in my bed for hours icing my neck and head down. Again, hooray! How old am I? yeah, that's what I thought. One foot in the grave.

• I feel uber sensitive to the cold lately. Like I've been walking around in fleece and with hats and scarves on and generally speaking we're hovering in the 50s, at least during the day. Forget it at night. Although my neck generally feels better in the cold (weird), I feel my blood has thinned. Why am I living in the South if it's going to be this cold? I need to head farther south I think.

• A benefit of the cold is that I can't wait for Christmas. Most years I get royally ticked off that the Christmas retail push starts around Halloween. This year with retailers crapping their pants about the recession I think the yard Santas and tinsel began appearing in stores BEFORE Halloween. I still didn't care, that's how excited I am for Christmas this year. (As evidenced by the ridiculous already wrapped presents.) The chill in the air only contributes to my Claus craze.

• This evening in my parents' neighborhood there was a full, upright McDonald's bag just sitting in the middle of a four-way stop. I'm sure some idiot thought it would be funny to put it there and considering the rather lovely south Charlotte neighborhood my parents live in, it's not exactly commonplace. It made me so damn angry. I was talking with a co-worker the other day about how I don't understand littering. Sure, sometimes a napkin or two might get away from you on a windy day. Or a pamphlet might fall out of your car while you're running errands. BUt chucking a full cup of soda out the window - cup included? Or leaving a big bag of half-eaten fries in the road? What the hell is that? Seriously? How do people not feel totally stupid doing it? Is it THAT difficult to hold on to your damn trash until you reach a real trash can? And if you do litter, have you ever gotten the insanely hilarious reaction you were hoping for by leaving an upright McDonald's bag in the middle of the road? Because I seriously doubt it.

I need to start writing all these points down on napkins during the day because I swear I had at least three more and I can't think of them for the life of me. Sorry. Hope all of you are well Hopefully I'll update in the next few days and at least some time before I turn 40. I don't like to disappoint the peeps. 

Happy nearly turkey day!!! Yay!

It's finally over ... kind of

Well, you won't see me shedding any tears over the loss of campaign ads. I thought this day would never come. The tension in the air today - hell, the past few weeks - was palpable. The voter turnout made me disgusted that every election doesn't have this kind of turnout. Most every other year people had to remind themselves to vote. This year, people were staking out spots in line with folding chairs and portable televisions. That's the way it should be every year.

That said, I found Obama's acceptance speech to be one of the most inspiring I've ever heard. More than the eloquent rhetoric, I was most impressed by his solemn demeanor. Unlike elections of the past where there's been lots of cheesy thumbs up and back patting, he looked like he was attending a funeral. And with good reason - it's not like he's won the damn lottery. He's inheriting the worst economy in a century. We're at war. Our country is in the crapper and everyone is looking to him - to whoever was voted into that position - for a solution.

It's true he's only a figurehead. Our problems are bigger than any political party and extend well beyond any one man's presidency. (Although it bears underscoring that inexperience shouldn't be an issue with any candidate - ever - after the performance of our current president - with all due respect for the position.) What inspires me most is that regardless of whether you believe in Obama or not, there's a passion and drive behind him. Even if you believe that's all he has going for him, it's more than our country has had for a really long time. I don't envy the man and I marvel at this, which he truly sees as his calling. 

What I wonder most is why so many people are so divided along party lines - so quick to blame the Republicans for our current ills or so eager to see the Democrats crash and burn when their promises aren't kept either. It's really disheartening. Parties should be immaterial. We're drowning and the rest of the world hates us. The U.S. dollar is rapidly approaching the value of the Confederate currency of old and yet we as Americans would rather sit around and finger blame? How lovely. 

Also, why in the HELL did the cameras continually rove back to the blubbering, tear-spattered face of Oprah during Obama's acceptance speech? I don't care what the hell Oprah's reaction is. It was like something out of a Saturday Night Live skit - every time the cameras panned back to her she was more distraught, more teary-eyed, more mangle-faced with emotion. It's true - it's a historic evening. I don't begrudge her the emotion. It was moving to see so much emotion on the faces of everyone. But don't zoom in on her again and again and again. She's a damn talk show host. I'm trying to hear the words of our newly elected president, not get distracted by her drama.

I received an open letter in my work e-mail a short time ago this morning from a Republican North Carolina congressional candidate who didn't win. It essentially was detailing how he was leaving campaign headquarters with a smile on his face because he not only ran a campaign he could be proud of but because it's only a matter of time before the Democrats crash and burn. He conceded that the Republican party took a beating in this election thanks to failed promises. But he also was quick to point out that the Democrats won on a platform of empty promises built on buckets of money that don't exist and through plans that can't realistically make it. He ended with, "the war for America has begun." 

This is the kind of shit I'm talking about. We shouldn't be fighting AGAINST EACH OTHER over America. We should be fighting TOGETHER to SAVE America. This isn't a time to screw around. Our problems are so vast that it's going to take more than half of us, more than a single party or singular political ideal to solve this shit. That's been our problem all along. It shouldn't be all or nothing. I'm sick of this crap.

I'd say it's over, but from the trash piling up in my inbox it's clear the mud-slinging, political polarization and us-versus-them mentality will continue. And Obama won't even be sworn in until January. Yay! 

Pop Rocks what?

As part of the candy bonanza I purchased to make up sweet treats for co-workers this Halloween, I bought a bag of mini foil packets of Pop Rocks, one of my all-time favorite candies. I just read on the packaging that Pop Rocks are made in Spain, but packaged in Mexico. Does this make sense to anyone? How do they ship all the Pop Rocks for packaging without them becoming moist and clumping together or popping all over the place? Isn't there some kind of cheap labor force closer to Spain that could be packaging these puppies? Or is it the proximity to the United States, which - I'm going out on a limb here - presumably consumes the most Pop Rocks? 

I am poppin' puzzled.