It's nearly 2 a.m. and I'm abed, sipping apple cider tea (delicious!) and listening to some of my favorite music, which is wafting softly from my computer speakers. God bless technology.
I ran 10 miles tonight - first time in my life I've run a distance like that straight. I didn't even rack up that kind of mileage playing sports. I hemmed and hawed about it all day. I missed the cool of morning and the afternoon was warmer than I imagined it would be. I was latently tired all day and kept contemplating a Sunday nap. By 5 I resigned myself to head out. I probably didn't hit the pavement until 5:30 or so. The weather was perfectly cool. The sun set while I ran so that my last mile or two was bathed in the warm pink glow of dusk.
I'm very ADD at the start of my runs. "Did I tie my right shoe too tightly? Yes, yes, I think I did. How far will I run? What's the mileage here again? And now here? What about here? Do my shoulders hurt? Yes, they do. Keep your arms down; don't tick off your neck. Is this sports bra enough? Maybe not. My boobs hurt. Even if they're rather small to hurt. But they do. Remember what you read - they don't have much natural support and running causes them to permanently sag. Isn't that the way. Why didn't I move this song in the order of my iPod? I'd like to listen to it later in my run. Is that guy on the path a pervert? He seems like one. I should only listen to my music in one ear so I can hear if the perv turns on me. Yeah, that's what I'll do..."
On and on it goes for at least two miles. Sometimes three. And that's just the running-centric talk. Often it strays to my life path. What I need to do. Trying to construct a mental list of tasks I need to get done and yet my brain is firing too fast and blood flow to it isn't exactly a priority at the time so it's hard to retain any plans I make.
By mile four or five I start to feel my oats. My brain starts to settle in and my thoughts waft slower. By mile seven on, I've hit an endorphin high and I laugh. I move my arms to the music as if I'm dancing while running. I do in-air drumming. I sing aloud. After the endorphins settle a bit, it's the only time my head is quiet. My body is focused on the motion of propelling me forward and it's made the executive decision that deep thoughts aren't necessary to make any of this action happen. I occasionally still attempt to do math at this time. It's a laughable mistake. My legs keep pumping. My arms keep swinging. I occasionally glance down to catch a glimpse of my legs. They're short but powerful. They've become more how I used to remember them. I'm thankful for their ability to get me from place to place.
The reflection of the moon glides along with me on the pond's surface as I round the last mile home. I stretch out by the mailbox, stars overhead. My muscles are tight, warm. The air has grown cold.
Later, I stretch out in the bathtub, using the warm water to coax my legs back to life. Now in flannel pants, there's nothing better in the world. It's taken until 2, but my eyes grow tired. We'll see how well I walk in the morning. ;)
Sleep well.
"Mockingbird sing
In the middle of the night
All his songs are stolen so he hides
Stole them out from whippoorwills
Screaming car alarms
He sings 'em for you special
He knows you're afraid of the dark
Come on, sorrow
Take your own advice
Hide under the bed
Turn out the light
Stars this night in the sky are ringing out
You can almost hear them sayin',
'Close your eyes now, kid.'
'Close your eyes now, kid.'" - Neko Case
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